6 Clickbait Articles From Sex Blogger World

We all know clickbait when we see it. It’s any vague headline that goads you into clicking it to read more details. It’s everything Upworthy has ever published. It’s every listicle EVER. But what if we had sex blogger clickbait? What if sex bloggers had our own Buzzfeed? (hehe, buzz… vibrators… get it?) Here’s exactly what that would look like:

5 SCARY FACTS ABOUT RIMMING

  1. It’s an asshole
  2. It’s an asshole
  3. It’s an asshole
  4. It’s an asshole
  5. Poop comes out of there
Author’s note: I am actually pro-analingus, but I encourage you to go about it as safely as you can! Safe sex can still be totally hot, and a dental dam (with some lube) is the perfect rimming accessory to make sure you don’t run afoul of any fecal bacteria, STIs, or exposure to blood.

3 PLACES YOUR PARENTS SHOULD HAVE HIDDEN THEIR VIBRATORS WHEN YOU LIVED AT HOME

  1. The side of the kitchen sink with dirty dishes (You would never have looked there)
  2. The laundry room (You would never have looked there either)
  3. Your room (Let’s be real, that room didn’t get cleaned until you left for college and they turned it into a home gym)

Tantus T-Rex dildo in front of laundry basket filled with socks

MAN REMOVES BUTT PLUG AND MAKES A SHOCKING DISCOVERY

Shit happens.

Joffrey Baratheon from Game of Thrones frowning and shrugging

ONE WEIRD TRICK TO MAKE YOUR CISHET DUDEBRO TRY A DILDO

Google search result for "prostate massage"

HUSBAND MAKES DOE EYES AT WIFE’S NEW STRAP-ON (CUTE)

Screenshot from Pom Poko of a shirime (body with eye for an anus) coming out of a trash can and startling a woman.

Screenshot from Pom Poko

3 SEX TOYS YOU NEVER NOTICED IN YOUR FAVORITE DISNEY FILMS

Screenshot from the Disney animated film Snow White showing Grumpy the dwarf with his nose circled and a photo of the Tenga Iroha Sakura in the bottom right corner

Picture of Ariel from the Disney animated movie The Little Mermaid with her fist circled and a picture of the Belladonna's Bitch Fist sex toy in the corner

Photo of Herbie the love bug with an image of a screenshopped BS dildo